Routine excitement
Sigh. It's only recently that I've realised that living on a tense knife edge between routine (autism) and novelty/excitement (ADHD) is not how most people experience their inner lives.
I'm still coming to terms with it, but even though I don't have a diagnosis, reading about AuDHD is quite liberating. For example, just accepting that I have an "interest-based neurology" allows me to cut myself some slack. Because, at the end of the day, I'm my own harshest critic.